My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do. 🛌✨😅
My wallet is like an onion, opening it makes me cry. 🧅😭
I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right. 💁♂️😆
I'm not clumsy, everything just gets in my way. 🤷♂️😅
When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye. 🍋😂
Life is short, smile while you still have teeth. 😁🦷
I don't need anger management, I need people to stop pissing me off. 😡😂