I'm an optimist. But I also understand that my chances of becoming a superhero are slim.
I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So, I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.
I'm not clumsy, it's just the floor hates me, the tables and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way.