Sarcasm: because yelling 'I hate you' is too mainstream.
I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, but the highest form of intelligence.
I'm not sarcastic. I'm just intelligent beyond your understanding.
I love sarcasm. It's like punching people in the face but with words.
I'm not a smart mouth; I just happen to have a witty tongue.
Sarcasm: the ability to insult idiots without them realizing it.
Well, aren't you a ray of pitch-black?
Sarcasm is the wit of the fool.
Oh, I'm sorry. Did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
Sarcasm is the body's natural defense against stupidity.
Oh, I'm sorry. Did I offend you with my common sense?
I'm not sarcastic. I'm just allergic to stupidity.
Sarcasm is the secret language that everyone speaks.
Sarcasm: because telling you to go to hell just wouldn't suffice.
I'm not shy; I'm holding back my awesomeness so I don't intimidate you.
Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair.
I'm sorry, did I roll my eyes out loud?
Sarcasm: because murder is illegal.
Sarcasm: because punching people in the face is illegal.