Eating snacks like it's a job.
Pretending to laugh at the jerk store joke.
Waiting for that soup to get better.
Explaining why it's not a 'big salad'.
Contemplating the puffy shirt life.
Keeping the Festivus spirit alive all year.
Discussing how it's not you, it's them.
Mulling over 'serenity now' strategies.
When you're master of your domain.