You can't buy happiness, but you can buy coffee, and that's pretty close.
My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch... I call it lunch.
I'm on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.
I don't need an inspirational quote, I need coffee.
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
My bed is a magical place. I suddenly remember everything I had to do.
When life gives you lemons, trade them for coffee.
Wine a bit, you'll feel better.