I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow; there is no humor in Heaven.
I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot.
Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand.
I think the next best thing to solving a problem is finding some humor in it.
Life is like a sewer... what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.
If I had to live my life over again, I'd live over a saloon.
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die.