I'm not short, I'm concentrated awesome.
When life gives you lemons, make sure they're not limes.
I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right.
If at first you don't succeed, maybe skydiving isn't for you.
When nothing goes right, go left.
The road to success is often paved with lost Wi-Fi connections.
I don't need an inspirational quote. I need coffee.
I'm not lazy, I'm on energy-saving mode.
My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.