I like to have a martini, two at the very most. After three, I'm under the table; after four, I'm under my host.
A woman drove me to drink, and I hadn't even the courtesy to thank her.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy.
Cocktails are a ritual. Embrace the process and savor the result.
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
Wine is sunlight, held together by water.
Cocktails may not be the answer, but they're worth a shot.
One martini is all right. Two are too many, and three are not enough.
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.
I drink to make other people interesting.
I feel bad for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
A cocktail done right can really show your guests that you care.
Give me books, French wine, fruit, fine weather, and a little music played out of doors by somebody I do not know.
The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
I drink to make other people more interesting.
Cocktails are like a present you give to yourself.
Happiness is...finding two olives in your martini when you’re hungry.