Certified procrastinator, finally got around to this certification.
Certified in sarcasm and wit.
Certified expert at starting books but never finishing them.
Certified professional at avoiding Monday blues.
Certified overthinker, even about this caption.
Certified in sleeping through alarms, but never this certification.
Certified napper, turning dreams into goals.
Certified in finding the best food places after hours of research.
Certified coffee enthusiast, with a side of certification.